It’s been seven weeks since my last blog post (yes, writing that feels like a confessional) and while I have often glanced at this blog during that time, something has kept me from writing. Here are some of the thoughts that have run through my mind lately:
‘I’m too busy.’
‘I just started a new job so I don’t have time.’
‘I have nothing interesting to say.’
‘I don’t have Internet at home.’
‘My dog ate my blog ideas.’
Excuses. Excuses. Excuses.
A few weeks ago, a friend asked, “Why do you resist being okay?” I looked at her, befuddled. Whatever do you mean?!? I shouted back at her (internally). I am okay…I’m more than okay! But I knew she was spot on. When I countered with, “But I meditate a lot. I even track my meditation on my iPhone app and average about 30.5 minutes a week…” She put her hand up and stopped me.
“What if you stopped tracking yourself, woke up each day, and asked yourself what you needed to be okay?”
“Hmmmm.” (Me, confused.)
“Would you still meditate?”
“Yes.”
“Then stop making it a chore.”
That was two weeks ago. I have not tracked my meditation since that conversation but I have meditated every morning before work for 10-15 minutes. With my dog. It’s an ongoing process…this whole “I-will-allow-myself-to-be-okay-and-stop-resisting-what-I-need” thing. I continue to be in awe of the journey because it makes me learn–and appreciate–something new every day.
For a quick look at how meditation can serve you, watch the following video (courtesy of goop):
Great that your new job is so much closer so you can use the commuting time you save in the morning to meditate – great way to start your and Luna’s day!
So many people can relate to this. This is a great reminder to show up for ourselves, not just our appointments!
Good post Maeve. Letting go of the letting go. All in due time as you said.